Posts Tagged ‘ Widow ’

Only Pro-birth? Ad hominem Attacks on Pro-life

Round 3!

A regular attack on those who are pro-life is that we are really only “pro-birth,” that we do not really care about the mother or child after birth.

Is this true?

We do have the biblical commands to take care of orphans, widows, and the poor and needy …

… for example:

You shall not mistreat any widow or fatherless child.
Exodus 22:22

He executes justice for the fatherless and the widow, and loves the sojourner, giving him food and clothing.
Deuteronomy 10:18
(So, yes, we should also take up the cause of many immigrants. Sorry, Conservatives.)

16 “Fathers shall not be put to death because of their children, nor shall children be put to death because of their fathers. Each one shall be put to death for his own sin.
17 “You shall not pervert the justice due to the sojourner or to the fatherless, or take a widow’s garment in pledge, 18 but you shall remember that you were a slave in Egypt and the Lord your God redeemed you from there; therefore I command you to do this.
19 “When you reap your harvest in your field and forget a sheaf in the field, you shall not go back to get it. It shall be for the sojourner, the fatherless, and the widow, that the Lord your God may bless you in all the work of your hands. 20 When you beat your olive trees, you shall not go over them again. It shall be for the sojourner, the fatherless, and the widow. 21 When you gather the grapes of your vineyard, you shall not strip it afterward. It shall be for the sojourner, the fatherless, and the widow.

Deuteronomy 24:16-21

 do not oppress the widow, the fatherless, the sojourner, or the poor, and let none of you devise evil against another in your heart
Zechariah 7:10

And from the New Testament:

Religion that is pure and undefiled before God the Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their affliction, and to keep oneself unstained from the world.
James 1:27

There are more, but you get the point.

I Also Know People

People I know personally disprove the idea that pro-lifers are “only pro-birth.”

Two friends of mine – a little older, but I still call them kids from time to time – are dating. They regularly volunteer their time with ministries that serve widows, orphans, single parents (not just mothers), and foster children.
Further, she is in the process of taking care of her grandson, because this boy needs someone in his life who has not abandoned him in one way or another.

No one can claim these two are only pro-birth.

I have friends who run “alternative centers” (usually called something like Crisis Pregnancy Centers, though one of these friends changed hers to “Pregnancy Resource Center” to remove the stigma of a crisis) that do not offer abortion to mothers.
They have counselors to help young mothers before, during, and after birth. There are regular drives to get supplies needed for young parents and babies (through teenage years).

Further, they and their spouses tend to be involved in end-of-life care and counseling (especially seeing as those spouses are pastors).

No one can claim they are only pro-birth.

Other friends are adoptive and foster care parents, some of them even going out of their way to get special needs children.

No one can claim they are only pro-birth.

It is rude at best, disingenuous and flat out wrong at worst to offer a blanket statement that pro-lifers are “only pro-birth.”

I know people who are pro-abortion but anti-assisted suicide or death penalty. (That is a different argument for another time!) This tells me it is unfair to say “Everyone who is pro-choice is really pro-death!”

It is inconsistent, though, especially for the Christian.

(And to take a moment to call out situations of those like Pastor Carl Lentz of Hillsong NYC, who at first responded otherwise (and thankfully changed his answer later), abortion is sin. It is not a gray area that is dependent on each person’s conscience. That is why we need a Savior. But each sin is equally bad in God’s sight, so thanks be to God He offers salvation for those sins through Jesus Christ.)

Uncoupled Love

I meant to post this earlier, but some sort of a spambot thing got to me through the blog. I took time to make sure my computer and those I communicate with would be safe!

In this little series on Valentine’s Day, I have looked at the history of the holiday, what it means for singles, and also for couples. What about that difficult issue of those who are no longer married?

Divorce

Why is it difficult?

Too many this is obvious: Divorce and Death. One is considered a sin and the other too painful to consider for most (and sometimes both can have swapped meanings or even both).

I will not get into the topic of the obvious sins of divorce or murder, but I will mention that Genesis (not the band) and Jesus both talk about becoming one flesh not getting a divorce. I think, for most people who might stumble across this blog, these are understood. I also have a feeling I will blog about this in the future.

When it comes to divorce, I can not and will not judge. As Jesus mentioned in Mark 10, no man should separate and marrying a divorceѐ is considered adultery. So is lusting. I am guilty of adultery.

When it comes to the widowed, my heart goes out to you, but I obviously do not truly understand. You were one flesh, so it is as if you lost half of yourself. I do not want to imagine losing my wonderful wife, so I cannot completely feel your pain. C. S. Lewis helped me with A Grief Observed, but again, I cannot fathom that pain right now.

For starters, if you have been through a divorce or lost a spouse, all of the points I discussed in the previous posts apply.

I think Paul explained things best in 1 Timothy 5 (and I think that it applies to divorcees as well as those who are widowed, male and female) (Taken from the NIV):

 3 Give proper recognition to those widows who are really in need. 4 But if a widow has children or grandchildren, these should learn first of all to put their religion into practice by caring for their own family and so repaying their parents and grandparents, for this is pleasing to God. 5 The widow who is really in need and left all alone puts her hope in God and continues night and day to pray and to ask God for help. 6 But the widow who lives for pleasure is dead even while she lives. 7 Give the people these instructions, so that no one may be open to blame. 8 Anyone who does not provide for their relatives, and especially for their own household, has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.

 9 No widow may be put on the list of widows unless she is over sixty, has been faithful to her husband, 10 and is well known for her good deeds, such as bringing up children, showing hospitality, washing the feet of the Lord’s people, helping those in trouble and devoting herself to all kinds of good deeds.

 11 As for younger widows, do not put them on such a list. For when their sensual desires overcome their dedication to Christ, they want to marry. 12 Thus they bring judgment on themselves, because they have broken their first pledge. 13 Besides, they get into the habit of being idle and going about from house to house. And not only do they become idlers, but also busybodies who talk nonsense, saying things they ought not to. 14 So I counsel younger widows to marry, to have children, to manage their homes and to give the enemy no opportunity for slander. 15 Some have in fact already turned away to follow Satan.

 16 If any woman who is a believer has widows in her care, she should continue to help them and not let the church be burdened with them, so that the church can help those widows who are really in need.

I think some advice my own lovely mother gave this past week applies perfectly:

My husband and I kept it very simple, but shared the evening with our bible study group doing a shared dinner. Yes I bought pink table cloths and red napkins at the dollar store and put candles and hershey kisses down the center of the table. However the fun was sharing a holiday with friends!

My suggestion for next year for singles and couples alike…spend the day being like Jesus… let everyone you know how blessed you are to have each and every one of them in your life! A simple note, a helping hand, and hug and a Thank you! I’m sure most people would be surprised to discover how many people would return the “love”.
If we could all focus on what we can give and not what we get…we would be far richer and happier than what money can buy!!

I think there are some people in this world who have this figured out (and for the record, I had no idea what my parents did for Valentine’s Day until she made this comment).

Valentine’s Day is a day to honor a man who honored God, so maybe that should be our example, eh?

If we know each other, you should know how much I truly love you. Not in the mushy, lovey-dovey way, but in the “I would do anything for you … even if I am not happy with you at this moment or you are my favorite person” kind of a way. Seriously, you are my family, because even if we are not related by birth many of us are related by Christ’s blood!

If we do not know each other, believe it or not I still love you! Why? Firstly because God loved you and me first. Secondly, I love you because I remember the need to be loved.

Single, dating, married, divorced, widowed, whatever, we are all in this together. In Christ we are empowered, so naturally I encourage all to follow Him. Either way, life is better when we do it together. Remember that. Not only Valentine’s Day but always.

I love you.

God loves you.